I spent the summer as Xolta in the upcoming web series Thong Girl vs. Xolta from Outer Space. I fell into the part...the same way I pretty much fall into everything in my life. I found out about the production from friends who are fans of the Thong Girl series and wanted me to try out for the Xolta role, I wanted to work behind the scenes. After talking to the director and asking about any staff he needed (even offering services free for experience) he talked me into the role..asked me to read the part of Xolta in my best seven of nine voice and I was soon covered in blue paint and playing an ex prostitute turned savior for her planet who accidentally destroys parts of Nashville, TN in her quest to be inseminated and re populate the earth with Xoltaneese. Sounds twisted..yeah it is.
The series makes absolutely no sense at all, so if you're looking for realism-this isn't your kind of show. Basically I beat up some people, Thong Girl repeats lines like wow! and golly gee! over and over, then we team up and fight a meaner alien than me..somehow wind up in space on a space ship-can't get back home and meet some ugly male aliens-who Xolta talks alot about procreating with. (why we can't have an attractive alien man is beyond me-but I digress.) Also Xolta always tries to kiss Thong girl for some rather annoying reason I haven't figured out. My best guess is because Xolta is trying to make thong girl her prison..errr space bitch.
The director had been looking for someone to fill this role for over a year and had even flown to LA and had casting calls there. I only took the role due to the fact I would be covered in blue body paint for the show, it was something I had never done before and I thought wow this is going to be fun. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Umm...at least i can say I did it.
First of all the blue isn't as flattering as I would have thought it would be, and neither are the outfits I ended up wearing. I just look blue...that's pretty much it...natural skin has contouring and color variation...but I'm just blue. You can barly see my facial expressions and I look sort of..blobish in my opinion. The costumes were ordered online and that never works for my body type, which is extremely curvy. There is about a 16 inch difference between my waistline and my hips. 16 INCHES...it's pretty hard to fit me by mail order. I also have a long torso and while not what I would call tall, I am slightly above average height-but I have short legs. I am as far from base sizes as one can get. Medium-ha ha, very funny.
I have three costume changes. A blue sparkly corset thing that does not do me justice...a red bikini get up that was so small that by the time we got it to fit me it just looked-well there really aren't words and..lastly in a couple scenes I'm pretty much just in blue paint. (don't get excited boys my boobs are ducktaped down and covered in latex and blue paint). Side note about the blue body paint scenes..everyone was very fooled and had no idea I had on what was pretty much a ducktape bra. They kept wondering why I didn't feel "exposed" walking around. I was more covered in the ducktape than some bikinis I wear-with the exception of the bottoms..I always opt for a full bottom and this was a thong. I find it humerus they thought they were seeing way more than they were, I was seriously ducktaped down! In all honestly though, the costumes were pretty much a nightmare.
Also the make-up took an average of 3 to 4 hours at 7am. I'm not the nicest person at 7am. I can be a serious bitch at 7am and the bad part is if I have to get up early I never get over that bitchey attitude all day. I am an up at 10am kind of girl. Waking up at 6 to be onset at 7, for months, is WAY beyond my skill set. The poor make-up artist had to listen to me complain every morning during the entire shoot. I really feel bad for her. She has met me outside of shooting (when I am not out late or up early) and told me I was an entirely different person. Look, I just require about 10 hours of sleep daily to function on a social level that is acceptable, or not be a slightly off -character that should be on prozac. I just do. I would be exhausted by the time I wold get on set to film. Filming usually started at about 12:30 and I would just be so sleepy I could barely even pronounce half of the sciency things that had to come out of my mouth. I had to talk so slowly at times to actually be able to pronounce the insanity I had to say that I'm betting it sounds as if my voice has been altered.
After filming for a couple of hours in five inch heels, covered in latex and squished into ill flattering clothing..I'd start to get dizzy and lose my breath. See, you can't sweat in an oil based body paint and latex. If they ran the fans on me I would freeze. It was as if my body forgot how to regulate it's temperature. I also began to bloat just a bit. Yeah-that was fun.
Then I could never get that paint off of me. It is everywhere around the house. On my couch, on my bathroom walls, it clogged up my drain, it is on my car seats, it is all over my clothing. It would take 3 days on average to get off. The best way was to use Hawaiian Tropic oil spray with no spf and let soak in it. Then use paint thinner for any remaining stains on my personage. It would seep into my white blonde hair, so I went ahead and put blue streaks in it around my crown and the nape of my neck to hide the splotches.
While I was paid, I have to say for me to go through all that..blueness again..I'd have to be paid 3x's what I was paid. See, this was the first time I had done a series. It's very different than a movie. You film day, after day, after day...instead of knocking it out in a few weeks. The physical level..especially in a series like this one..is really high. I have new respect for people on tv now! I ended up quitting my job because I didn't have enough time for all of my filming projects-I am also starting to understand why actors are paid what they are. I totally didn't get that before I started working on this show. There really isn't anyway an actor can do some of the crazy things required of them and then hold a regular nine to five job. I mean, in addition to all the make up I had fight and dance choreography I had to learn! Hell I personally can't stay awake that many hours in a day to actually leave a set and then do anything other than sleep! Plus, I couldn't be taken seriously talking with businesses still drenched in left over blue paint from the day before.
The best part I have to say was filming with Jim O'Rear. I'm only on set with him once actually but it's really great to work with an actor you can play off of. Jim was funny and I think our brief scenes together make the series. Jim is natural on camera and it brings my inner cheese ball to the next level to act against him! I haven't actually seen anything from the series yet, but I'm curious to see how it is going to look all edited together! All in all I learned quite a bit from this small production-things that will take my skills to the next level.
