The truth we can't admit out loud about labyrinth..

First let me state I loved Labyrinth as a kid. In fact its a very girl positive movie. Female hero..nobody rushes in and saves her..that kind of thing. Yes preteen girls in the 80s LOVE them some Labyrinth. I have heard all kinds of theories about this movie..relating it to a girls sexual awakening to just growing up in general. Why are there so many theories on this film..because to take it at face value is just to hard for us to do...because the lead male character is almost 40 while the lead female is only about 14. SO LET ME BE BLUNT. We don't need crazy theories the film is self explanatory...

David Bowie was great in this movie and I'm not saying the character should have been played by another person (it probably wouldn't be a cult favorite if it was) but uh...Bowie was WAY to old to play the character of the goblin king for out brains to accept the story...as is. So adults...most particular male adults it seems...feel as if they have to come up with some alternate explanation for the film. You can do that all you want but it doesn't change the story.

Sara is a really pretty 14(ish) year old girl who is fascinated with a book about the goblin king. The real goblin king takes note of her and falls in love with her. (now this can even be her imagination, but if it is..she is totally into older dudes) He loves her so much that he would do anything for her...and when she finally asks for something he is given the opportunity to be a part of her life. She then rejects his gift and his declaration of love ( I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave.) and asks for him to return her brother to her. She has no desire to give up her life with her family to be with him. Devastated he tells her fine her brother is in my castle and if you can get him back..he is yours. He does this as an attempt to manipulate her and win her love. ( I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for *you*!) She however gets her bother back..tells him basically she has no feelings for him (you have no power over me) and sets everything right. For us to admit that this is a story about unrequited love means we are ok with pedophilia...but I mean the story is what it is. Maybe it would make more sense if the goblin king was played by a teen and we could just say what the story is without making up fake theories. ..but I can't deny David Bowie was great in the film, and its quite funny to think of Bowie in a children's flick.

Lose 5 five pounds with jumping jacks....

Yes I know all kinds of horrible ways you can drop five, ten and even fifteen pounds in a month...this however is by far the easiest AND its probably really good for your cardiovascular health.  Also this isn't like a magic pill or spell, it isn't easy-but it is kinda fun to challenge yourself every once and a while. I am not making wild promises to you. If you do this you will lose about a pound and a half a week. THAT'S IT. Anyone who promises you can lose more than that a week (without training like crazy and starving yourself..is lying) Also I am not a doctor, trainer or anything. I have a social work degree...we can talk about how you feel about your body if you like...but that's about all I am actually trained to do...lol. HOWEVER..from personal experience I know this works and its far easier than an hour in the gym every night or eating some crazy restrictive diet. It also isn't going to shape you up...you need weights for that or maybe squats, I don't know. I am not a trainer, remember.

1. Eat sensibly- weight loss is based primarily on what you eat. so don't eat like a whole pizza or drink a bottle of wine. Don't go nuts and deny yourself all the time either because you wont last 30 days.

2. Eat a-lot of cabbage. If you don't think you can stomach it..then skip this..but I firmly believe cabbage is good for digestion. Again I'm not a doctor, but it worked for me. Seriously I am a big cabbage advocate... or lettuce or kale if you like..whatever..eat a salad people.

3. So here is the main part. This is the part you have to do that you aren't going to like. Are you ready? You are going to need to do 1,000 jumping jacks every day. EVERY DAY. Well I actually did circuit training on Sundays and normally skipped Saturdays but I would think EVERYDAY would be best. Basically that is burning approximately 500 calories daily. I accomplished this by doing 75 of them 15x a day..which actually put me just a tiny bit over the 1000 mark.

I guess I am going to start my 1000 jumping jacks a day next Monday and I'll be 5 to 7 pounds thinner by mid February. :) If you decide to do it too..let me know in 30 days how it all turned out!!